Some say the only difference between rich and poor people is when they spend their money. I think it’s more complicated than that (the amount you make matters a lot, too), but there is an important lesson in waiting to spend your money until after you’ve invested first. This principle is even reflected in common sayings, such as “first work then play”. The principle is bigger than that though and goes beyond money: having the self-discipline to delay some joyful activity isn’t something babies are born with on day one. It’s a skill that has to be learned and for most of us it takes years to master. It is conditioned behavior that has helped us to build more advanced societies. It’s planning for a rainy day.

When our son was younger he visibly struggled with the concept. “Why should I wait if I can have it right now? ” he asked many times. I explained that it was important to first finish the tasks that were expected of him before he could reward himself with the activity he wanted to do or the toy he wanted to have.

Last week-end I took him grocery shopping and promised him to buy him a small toy as a reward. We had a great time working the list of groceries together and when we were almost done we strolled over to the toys aisle. Ro browsed the many toys they had, but couldn’t really get excited about a single one. After walking up and down the aisle, inspecting a toy, then putting it back on the shelf he declared: “I don’t want to buy a toy here today, daddy. I rather wait and buy the little drone I wanted for so long online.” While that decision was bad news for the brick and mortar store, I was extremely proud that he was able to overcome his impulse and rationalize about which toy he really wanted. Even if it meant to wait another two days until it arrived. Instant gratification was defeated. I immediately agreed to order that toy together at home (paid for from his money – as he offered) and praised him for the good choice he made.

He’s definitely growing up.